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Monday
Jan242011

Questions Answered

Last week I opened the door and invited you all to ask about my life, my choices, and any other questions you want answered. And, my, have I gotten a TON of responses! Above all, I want to just thank you all for your overwhelming support. It feels really, really good to have you guys to fall back on. Okay, I’m going to try my best to answer as much as possible.

I’ll start with a fun question. What is your favorite song/band? A lot of my music library was built off of my mother’s. She had a lot of great classics like Janis Joplin, Fleetwood Mac, Bob Dylan, The Band, and then some 80s stuff like Human League, Depeche Mode, Duran Duran, etc. Then there’s my favorites from when I was growing up: Heart, The Cranberries, Jewel, and let’s not forget the great Pat Benatar. You asked about “THE” song? The one song that gets me going and makes me feel all warm and fuzzy inside? “We Belong” by Pat Benatar. Hands down. Love it!

Isn’t there anyone in Utah that supports you all in public? Short answer: no. Longer answer: yes, maybe, I don’t know, eventually. I know there’s people like our neighbors Pam and Carl that will stick by us through thick and thin. They’re always so nice and supportive. People are scared to support us publicly, especially up on the Hill where Bill works now. He is really on his own up there. I think once people see that we all love one another and operate just like any other “normal” family we will begin to see a little more support. Our dinner with that Midge lady and her crazy anti-porn mother was a step in the right direction. There’s a chance she could be Bill’s first ally on the hill.

What are you going to do about Ana and Goran? Ana is carrying Bill’s child. He loves her and he loves that little boy with all his heart. Goran is going to help raise that child, so Bill definitely has plenty of love and respect towards him for that. We all do love each other, and it’s very complicated, but they have to leave the country. I’ve come to accept that it is only right. Ana wanted me to leave my family behind and come with them, but I could never do such a thing. I cried as Bill blessed their child not only because Ana and Goran were leaving… no, it wasn’t just that. Seeing Bill bless that baby? Seeing him put all the love he has into something he created and now must send away? I could see how much it truly hurt him deep inside. Later on that night I peered in on him bathing little baby Nell, singing to her. Moments like these remind me why I was drawn to him in the first place.

Do you still have feelings for Goran? No. Is Goran a sexy Serbian man who gave me comfort when my family was going off the tracks? Yes. But nothing ever happened between us and nothing ever will.

Do you and Bill still have your nights together? Yes, we do, and they are wonderful!

Do you feel resentment towards Bill for causing you to lose your career? I don’t. Hearts On A Sleeve was a great experience. For a while there I was making a good deal of money, and I guess you could’ve called me quite the independent woman. From VSN I learned the ins and outs of the business world and, above all, how to market myself. I now have the tools to begin something new, maybe even start up my own business, and this GojiBlast stuff seems to be a solid stepping stone to help regain my footing.

Do you forgive Beverly? Girl’s gotta do what a girl’s gotta do. Yes, I forgive her, and I respect her for making the decision. Doesn’t mean I’m not mad about it. In the grand scheme of things, I did something wrong. I lied. Life goes on. 

If you could take the family in a different direction, what would it be?  I believe that we are moving in the right direction. When I came into this family, when I left the trailer park, I had nothing. Didn’t have much faith either. I’ve grown a lot since then, and my faith in the Principle has gotten much stronger. Bill has already made more progress than anyone since our lifestyle was banned, and I’m proud to stand beside him. If I could take the fam in a different direction for, say, one month? Big family trip to Europe! Climb the Eiffel tower, see the Berlin Wall, sunbathe on the coast of the Mediterranean…  that would be amazing.

Why don’t you just leave Bill? Bill has given me everything! He’s given me a loving family. He’s given me two wives and their undying support. He’s given me all the love in the world and he continues to give and give day in and day out. When I came into this family it was LOVE that kept me here. I had never experienced love like the way Bill and Barb and Nicki and all the kids love me, not even from my mother. This family is bursting and boiling over with love! And yes, we have our problems, our jealousies, and our own little secrets, and we may want to strangle each other at times, but we’re a family. That’s how families work. All our differences stem from our intense love and desperation to keep the family moving forward in one piece.

Somebody wrote that my faith in God should give me the strength to leave Bill, but I couldn’t disagree more. My faith in God gives me the strength to STAY. To work through the problems that would normally tear us apart; those instances only make us stronger. Faith gives me the strength to accept the fact that Ana and Goran – two of my truest friends – need to leave the country not only for our sake, but for theirs, and the baby’s too. Faith gives me the strength to take Bill’s and Barb’s and Nicki’s hands on the steps of the capitol and declare our true selves to the world. Faith pulls families together; it doesn’t tear them apart. It will not tear us apart. Gosh, thanks for asking that question. It was very enlightening to think that through!

Well I hope these answers are informative for you guys. It’s always very helpful for ME talking about this stuff. I’m slowly but surely getting a grip on our situation, and the more I think about it, the more I talk about it, the more I realize that I’m in the right place.

Talk to you again soon.

xo,

Margie



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Reader Comments (37)

who is the writer for BIG LOVE? Roman Grant keeps the series on edge, but now he's dead just 1.5 seasons away from the finale, does that make any sense? Sorry, but this final season fails to thrill me!!! Should go revive Roman Grant (smile ).
January 24, 2011 | Unregistered Commentertoni turner
I completely agree that family is everything and if you have a loving one you have the greatest gift of all. That is never worth throwing away no matter how you may feel in a moment of anger. Home is where the heart is. Family is life.
January 24, 2011 | Unregistered CommenterDebstar
Margene, Nasty Nicki told Bill that you wouldn't know a blessing if it bit you on the nose. How can that be? Haven't you had training in your faith? Hasn't Bill given you blessings many times? He should be doing that for the whole family; he;s the first responder to help any family membe with spiritual needs first.r
January 24, 2011 | Unregistered CommenterElder Bari
I asked you about song/band! I happen to love We Belong as well. It was the first song I ever sang at Karaoke.
I posted a video of me singing Pat Benetar's Heart breaker here: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=xKLHJlOTNbg
I can actually sing better than that, I really couldn't hear myself. Haha.
I saw Pat Benetar in concert in 1996 in Detroit too!
I have watched/read since you started this whole journey. I am actually going to take a trip to the Mormon "mecca" of Salt Lake to visit a lot of RM's from here but I am going to Sandy too. I am excited!
January 24, 2011 | Unregistered Commenterabbabeffy
Please enlighten your fans why this is the FINAL season of BIG LOVE (everyone's favorite HBO series - - EVER?)
January 24, 2011 | Unregistered Commentersandy
I hate that this is the last season of Big Love!!! Last night was a really good episode. Can't wait for next weeks episode.
January 24, 2011 | Unregistered CommenterLeisha
dear margene,
i am such a fan of the Big Love series. adore watching you and barb and nicki and bill interact. i am neither a mormon nor a polygamist but the show has revealed many benefits of polygamy, which i find fascinating. really gives food for thought. valuable insights into marriage, as a concept.
your character adds balance to the trio of sister-wives. the song that begins "i was working as a waitress in a cocktail bar, when i first met you" is one of my favorites too (ref. episode #1 jan 2011). keep being margene. :+)
January 24, 2011 | Unregistered Commenterricki dorn
dear margene,
i love your postings! i have felt like part of this family since your episode. i'm so disapointed the this the last season i cried when i found out! i would love 20 more years with all of you!!! please make them change thier minds! i was also wondering if you are going to move into the new house this would be great!!! i think everyone would love to see thefamily undeer one roof where you belong!! chin up sweetheart! i love you all! i'll be watching!
cheri l from andover, ohio
January 24, 2011 | Unregistered Commentercheri l
Margene, you are such a sweet soul. You have so much going for you. Hang in there, you'll know what to do and it will feel right. Barb is wavering in her own rite and is still support for you if you let her be. Nikki, is, well, Nikki. You'll be alright. I'm on your side and so are many others.
January 24, 2011 | Unregistered CommenterJill
I am going to have the differing opinion here, what you are experiencing with that family is not real love. You might love your children with Bill, and you should love your children, but Barb and Nicolette do not love you. Your mom raised you without love, and you cling to the first thing that gives you this so called love. Margene, I believe you would be much stronger without Bill, and I do not like you acting like he gives you everything. No, his three cute wives give him everything, and he is a bit egotistical and selfish. You could go out on your own and make it in the world. You do not need Bill, that is not a a healthy love.
January 24, 2011 | Unregistered CommenterBearie
I agree margene the love that you have with Bill, Barb and Niki is the bet kind of love there is, you have a great family. God Bless all of you !!!!!!!!!
January 25, 2011 | Unregistered CommenterSteven
omg i love marge!!!! :) if i met a women like her! id scoop her up in a sec. sorry bill.
January 25, 2011 | Unregistered Commenterjames petrovicz
So i'm OBSESSED with Big Love. And I have to say though Margie runs a close second..Nicki is my favorite character. And the more she pushes..the more I can't help but love her. But how is she holding on to this family with her attitude? Is it that they feel the same way about her as I do? That it's her pushy, cocky, bull headed attitude that they love? I'm just saying she has to be hard to love..and it just seems a bit unrealistic for everyone to actually love her.
January 25, 2011 | Unregistered CommenterAlisha
So kiddo. Mormon's don't really practice polygamy any more do they. It was outlawed right. Personally I believe in the key word choice. To allow it all. Make 2 children per family (by choice), to allow a woman the right to make choices over her own body etc. It seems to me though Mormon's in general all vote the same. As do other groups. Without a lot of thought. For awhile Mormon's didn't allow Black's to hold the Priesthood now they do. Would you say Mormon's and Fundamentalist Christians are the most like people in Islamic Countries? I wonder if it is all about self hate. People tend to hate themselves...what they see in others they cannot stand. For years people like Hal Lindsey said the world would end if we had a Mormon such as Romney as President (a corporate whore masquerading as a politician). Do you think Bill is caught up in his crystallized dogmatic forms. Are not all beliefs lies? Do you think political shows like CBN (a religious show pretending to be media so as to manipulate thought for a desired outcome) should be tax exempt? If you were not a Mormon what religion would you be. Should women hold the priesthood? Why do people need AK 47's?
January 25, 2011 | Unregistered CommenterRob Gee
Margie!

Although I cannot say that I understand your lifestyle. I say that I do not oppose your right to do so. I can see that your family is the loving environment provided by thoughtful consenting adults that so many children aren't lucky enough to have in so called 'normal' nuclear families. I support Bill's vision to reform and end abuses on the compounds and bring your lifestyle into the light (which is the only disinfectant of evil) so that people can come to understand instead of fear you.

So many people are denied their basic civil and human rights because the people around them fear something they do not understand. A Threat to freedom any where is a threat to freedom everywhere.

I also respect you personally for your positivity. The most successful people have failed more then they succeeded, it's the willingness to keep trying that sets you apart. Keep your chin up Margie.
January 25, 2011 | Unregistered CommenterJesse
Are we ever going to know what happened to Rhomda? or Wanda Hunt? some of us would like to know before the season ends.
January 25, 2011 | Unregistered Commenterrebecca
I received this link from my HBO twitter feed, and I have to say, probably one of the weirdest things I've ever seen. Not necessarily the blog post itself, but the fact that folks are posting comments as if Margene is a real person. Lol.
January 25, 2011 | Unregistered CommenterBshake
I love the show and I love Marene! There are so many of us who can identify with you, whether we're Mormons, Non-mormons, or whatever. You're awesome and keep it up. I am saddened that this will be the last season but all seasons have been great!!
January 25, 2011 | Unregistered CommenterKayla
Terrific series. Very sincere sweet characters. Has really got me thinking about the nature of love and support. I love the teamwork and the sharing. I first saw the series on a trans-Canada flight and thought the sex was amazing. I truly thought is was a Canada thing due to mature content. Very nice work, thank you.
January 25, 2011 | Unregistered Commenterrfc2530
I love this season, but, am very sad that it is the last. Please don't let Big Love end yet!
January 25, 2011 | Unregistered CommenterJanet
Bill really screwed up when he told you if you weren't happy, you could leave.Not very sensitive or loving.He should have put his arms around you and told you how much he loved you and would do anything for you.Bill needs to be a leader and comforter at home first, before he takes on the rest of the world.
January 25, 2011 | Unregistered CommenterT
good luck to all of you! We dont get to see the programme anymore as it nolonger on terrestrial telly anymore. So I have to catch up with the bits on facebook! SAD but thats life the last episode I sawe Margene was doing some gardening and collapsed because she was pregnant. Love to all Julie Marks England.
Margene,

What are you going to do if that law passes? Have you given it much thought? What will become of the family and why isn't anyone talking about it? What will you do if Bill no longer can support you? You need to think of a backup plan now before it's too late.

L
January 26, 2011 | Unregistered CommenterLinda
"... Not necessarily the blog post itself, but the fact that folks are posting comments as if Margene is a real person..."
January 25, 2011 | Bshake

phew!! gosh you just helped me! i was beginning to get SCARED thinking margene d character and the show cast is REAL!
January 26, 2011 | Unregistered CommenterSpicy
Margene-
what was the out of control dancing?Is this because of Ana and Goran leaving? the three of you are great together. Bill has cost you alot, hashe given that much for you? stay strong!
January 26, 2011 | Unregistered Commenterjmom

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